2 earphones in ears = don’t talk to me. 1 earphone in ear = don’t talk to me. No earphones in ears = don’t talk to me.

Dance like no one’s going to put it on YouTube or Facebook.

When someone rings the doorbell, why do dogs always assume it is for them?

Michelle went from being “Its’ complicated” to ”In a relationship”

I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.

I would rather check my Facebook than face my checkbook.

I love how when my soap runs out in the shower, my shampoo magically transforms into body wash.

All work and no play, will make you a manager.

My debit card is starting to feel like a gift card. “Not sure how much is on this, but we’ll give it a try.”

It’s kind of patronizing that a computer asks you to prove you’re not a robot.

I’m staring a petition for Barbara Walters to do the Ball Drop next New Year just to hear her say “ I’m Barbara Walters, and this is 2020”

I messed up already. 2020 is going to be my year for sure.

Sex is not an answer, but a question. “Yes is the answer”.

We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.

If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong.